On the potty
22nd April 2009
“Oh! The poop’s knockin’ on the bum door!”
I choke on the glass of water I’m holding.
“Lucy! Where did that come from?!”
“Daddy taught me.”
“Uh-huh. What a surprise.”
Eric from downstairs: “I’m proud of that one.”
“So, are you going to go poop?”
“Yes. In three minutes.” Holding up three fingers.
“Are you sure you have to go?”
“Yes, Mumma. The poop’s knockin’…”
“OK, I get it.”
We wait. Several minutes go by with my daughter and I locked in a Mexican stand-off: Her perched on the toilet, me on the edge of the tub.
“Nuthin’, huh?”
“I just love Mumma!”
“I realize that, Honey, but are you going to poop? This is the third time we’ve tried, and we’ve been in here for 10 minutes.”
“I want to watch a movie.”
“OK. Let’s go do that.”
“No, in here.”
“You want me to bring the television and DVD player into the bathroom?’
“Yes.”
“Listen, this isn’t a drive-in bathroom, Missy. We don’t set up shop here.”
“But, Mumma, the poop’s knockin’ at the bum door!”
“Trust me, Love, if it’s still knockin’ after 15 minutes, chances are it’s not coming out to play right now.”
“I really love pink! And purple! And red is your favourite colour, and blue is Daddy’s. I think Spencer Dog likes brown, but we don’t know what Baby Alice’s favourite colour is.”
“Do you even realize you’re sitting half nekkid on the toilet right now?”
“Mumma, the poop’s…”
“OK, get off.”
And so the dance continues. She tries and tries and tries, and ends up going in her diaper at the end of the day. I give her props (we touch knuckles when we say this, in our lame attempts to be cool) for trying, but mygoodness it’s a long and frustrating process. I know some of you must have gone through this. I think its because Lucy has always pooped standing up in her bed, and now sitting is a whole different position to master.
Added from your comments: We try sitting on the little potty, too, and on the toilet with a potty seat. She also knows she gets a special “Princess Treat” (a Disney chocolate egg with toy inside) when she goes. And she has gone a handful of times in the past six months, but very sporadically.
Any advice?
Possibly related posts:
Patience and it’ll come. My daughter, thankfully, finished with the poop thing waaaaaaay before the pee thing – less mess. She is still wearing a pull-up at nap and bedtime, but I’m truly waiting for the warmer weather as not to have to put any pants on her for sleeping. It will allow her to get up and go to the potty if she needs to. Although, one thing is a bit odd: she insists to take off her shirt when she is pooping. I try and tell her that this is only ok at home and not if we are in a public place. She says, “Ok Mum-mum”, but I’m not convinced she really understands it. She also requests a book to read, seeing as we tend to take the Star/Parenting magazines with us to the bathroom – there is truth to “monkey see, monkey do”. Anyway, I have a book near all three toilets for her to concentrate on ‘something else’ other than the task at hand. Perhaps that is what Lucy means by watch a movie in the bathroom…a distraction? Having said all of that, she did have an accident at grandma and grandpas house and seemed embarassed that it happened and wasn’t able to let us know as she was way upstairs and we were all downstairs at the time. So, it still happens, and it’s all at their own timing.
You’re doing your best, and that is all that matters, Carly!
are her feet propped up on something? Lucia does better on a little potty (plastic one on the floor) than the big toilet because she uses her feet to push I think. We also went through constipation issues when potty training – we did lots of prune juice (diluted in half), fruits with pits, fibre (even Benefiber sometimes), and extra water to make it softer and easier to come out. The ultimate thing that worked? a chocolate when she made a poo – worked like a charm.
I 2nd what Cristen said. Sometimes they have a hard time “letting go” when they are hanging in space.
Aerik went on the small potty (line with a coffee filter..it really makes the mess less) and Ava went on the big one no problems ..
Keep trying ! Sounds like she gets the concept just doesn’t want to “let go” lol
I like the reward thing too. We used stickers but that might not be enough for Miss Lucy
I don’t have much to add other than just encouragement to you and Lucy. While we did have potty training issues of our own with Isaac (it was mainly resistance on his part) he never had physical problems going poop on the potty. I eventually got him going by limiting his pullups only at bedtime. Isaac was very resistant to potty training and was perfectly content living in diapers and there wasn’t a single reward or argument in the world that convinced him otherwise. Needless to say I was extremely frustrated, even more so because I knew he could do it but he flat out refused. I had many friends who had boys who reassured me it would happen. And it did so I guess my point is patience is probably the most important tool to use right now. Hope she gets it soon…I know those 3 year old poops are NASTY business.
I have no advice as I haven’t gone through potty training with my daughter yet, just a few novelty pees, but want to say this post is really funny and entertaining
I have a feeling only a parent could really appreciate this subject matter.
I agree with the small potty on the floor… Mya didn’t use a potty seat on the big toilet until she was fully trained on both pee and poo… I read online they like to be able to push off the floor…
I am going thru simillar problems. My little one doesn’t like to go pee in the potty when she is outside or at the mall. She is plenty ok with peeing in her pants and NOT moving. I now make her take her wet clothes off in the tub. We talk about making it to the toliet and she says she will try. However if we are in doors at home, family, friends, and daycare she uses the toliet just fine. Not so much at the mall or outside. She is going to be 3 in July and I am wondering how much longer how much more patient do I have to be? When she pees her pants she becomes at statue she just doesn’t move. lol
Mrs. A, we went through the same thing with Lucy. I remember shopping for a stroller while pregnant with Alice last summer, and repeatedly asking Lucy if she had to go. After many no’s, she just…peed herself, right down to puddling in her shoes. Yuk.
Have you asked your daughter if she’s afraid of the toilets/washrooms in public places? Because that’s what it was for Lucy. It took her months to actually go pee in public, and even now I am rarely “allowed” to flush the toilet — I wait until she’s outside the stall and do it then.
Until we were 100% confident in her public peeing, we kept her in what we called traveling underwear — the Kushies lined ones (see my review of them here: http://durhamregionbaby.com/2008/07/where-i-profess-my-love-for-a-specific-brand-of-waterproof-underwear-and-die-a-little-inside/). Maybe try her in those. I never wanted to revert back to diapers when we went out and give her the message it was OK to pee in them.
Hope that helps — good luck!
No advice since I have clearly failed at potty training, but I totally loved what Lucy said so now we’re all using it – the pee/pooh is knocking at the bum door!!! I was sort of hoping it would help Oliver figure out when he needed to go. It almost worked yesterday. So thanks!!