My firstborn, Isaac, was a tough lesson in the school of “expect the unexpected� and really put my first-time mommy nerves to the test. Breastfeeding, for starters, was not at all natural for us and required patience and tons of practice. Who knew? Certainly not this new mommy. Then there was the whole sleep issue. Who knew some babies don’t know what it means to “sleep like a baby�? Again, not me.

So when I became pregnant with our second child last June, I was completely prepared to expect the unexpected. I should have known better.

Seven blurry weeks ago, we were caught off guard when I went into labour 11 days early. By the time I arrived at our local hospital, I was six centimeters dilated. I burst into tears when the nurse told me they had no doctor on duty to deliver my baby. The solution? Load me into an ambulance and ship me off to our neighbouring city’s hospital, over 100 kilometres away, with siren and flashing lights in full force. As frightening as it was, I still couldn’t help but laugh at the craziness of it all, knowing that one day it would be a story that would surely delight my child.

Fortunately I kept my name off the front page of our newspaper, making it the big city hospital on time, but with little to spare. I was nine centimeters and there wasn’t any time for formalities.

“We’ll wait for your husband to arrive and then we’ll break your water,� the doctor said. My husband, Joe, had followed in our truck.

On February 10^th, 45 minutes after I arrived at the hospital, our second little man, Alexander Gregory, made his grand entrance into the world, weighing seven pounds, 12 ounces and measuring only 17-inches long. He was absolutely beautiful and I immediately christened him “little Buddha�.

After it was all over, the nurses and doctors left us alone for family time. Joe and I were elated and marveled at our new little guy. Life was absolutely perfect.

But then the nurse came back and caught us off guard again.

As she examined Alexander under the heat lamp she asked us, “Has he seen the pediatrician?� “Not yet,� I said.

“I’m going to call him. He looks healthy but…,� she said, then pausing, “I think he may have some characteristics of Down syndrome.�

We were speechless.

“Don’t worry hon,� I said to Joe, after she left. “Remember when Isaac had his first hearing assessment and it came out inconclusive? It turned out fine.� In my mind I was thinking the nurse was mistaken, and that once the doctor came he would confirm that everything was alright.

A while later the pediatrician arrived and after a brief examination of Alexander he turned to us and said, “I’m 90 per cent certain he has Down syndrome but we will have to do chromosome testing to confirm.â€? He then pointed out the tell-tale characteristics to us – the thick skin fold at the back of his neck, the folded-over ears, the floppiness of his body – and then proceeded to explain the condition.

It felt like my heart was caught in my throat. I sat there nodding my head in silence, hoping he would just shut up and leave so that I could collapse in to my husband’s arms and cry. I didn’t want to hear about Down syndrome and I certainly didn’t want to believe that our beautiful little man had it. The doctor finally left and the nurse whisked me off for a bath. I remember working hard to maintain my composure as she wheeled me past the nurses’ station as I felt like all eyes were on us and that we had already been labeled as “those poor parents with the Down syndrome baby�.

Later, in my hospital room, Joe and I finally let our guards down and cried, trying to absorb this undesirable news. We both wanted to take each other’s grief away but it was still too new and hard to believe. We called our parents, all living thousands of kilometers away from us, and shared our bittersweet news. My heart broke as the joy in my mom’s voice was replaced by worry when I couldn’t answer yes to her, “And everyone’s healthy?� Naturally the grandparents were just as heartbroken, perhaps even more so as they were not only worried for their new grandson, but now also for their children.

However, our initial shock and concern with the Down syndrome was quickly placed on the backburner as we learned that our little Buddha wasn’t as healthy as he appeared to be.

Angie Cossette is a former Whitby resident and a temporarily retired magazine editor, now living in southern Saskatchewan with her husband Joe, two sons Isaac and Alexander, and crazy border terrier, Otto.

Possibly related posts:

1. Part 2: Alexander the Great
2. Alexander’s here, too!
3. For my Alex: 21 things
4. Jen Baby Watch 2008: An update
5. Lucy’s birth story: Part 1